Friday, January 4, 2013

How many kids?

With various parties, get-togethersand chance encounters, over the last year and a half, small talk seems toalways turn to kids.  Most moms have avery easy time answering the “how many kids do you have” question.  I however, got that deer-in-the-head lightlook, as I struggled with how to answer that question.  I generally answered with the very "adult-like"answers of “uhm, one?” or sometimes a more firm “one…ish”  (As I have previously mentioned, we have beenmatched with and love a little boy, but have yet to bring him home.  In fact, as of right now, we are not involvedin the daily decisions or care of our son, nor do we have any legal rights asparents.)   

If I answered with the uncertainresponse, most folks jumped to different conclusions (1) I’m currentlyexpecting in the traditional biological way or (2) we’ve lost a child. And thenI would have to explain the situation. Occasionally, I had people shake theirheads, almost in disbelief, like I couldn’t countJ.  If I answered with the more firm response ofone…ish, Before they could ask  gender,how old he or she is, developmental stage, etc,I gave a little bit about theadoption story, what we know about him, etc. As travel time gets closer and I am no longer surprised by the questionof “how many kids do you have?” I have become a little more practiced in sayingwe have a son in Korea and are waiting to bring him home. 

I am certainly looking forward tobringing him home and the first time I can answer, we have one son and he isfinally home.  I’m curious, how have youresponded to such questions?


  1. I never thought of how strange that would be. I often find myself asking people if they have kids... and my follow up is how many! In my opinion, you should be able to say one without any hesitation! Won't it be amazing when you have him in your arms!

    1. I think it is a natural question, I just wasn't always sure how to answer :) I can't wait till he is home.

  2. Ah, the eternal question...I feel this same way when someone asks me. "4, but one in heaven" is a real conversation stopper. Sounds like you're a pro at fielding these remarks. What a blessing it will be to be chasing little man around the room when he is HOME!